Dear Moms & Dads who are in the baby & toddler trenches,
It gets better. Hearing that doesn’t change your exhaustion or frustration or the fact that its a treat to pee in peace…I get it. We had 3 kids in 31 months and then moved 12 hours from support. I know sleep deprivation. I know chaos. I know the time of piecing your day by “What can we do the next 30 minutes?” I know there are moments and days you secretly, maybe shamefully, wished you had a fast forward button.
I understand why you may roll your eyes when people tell you to “cherish each day because they grow up fast!”. I rolled my tired eyes too. It was usually when I had a kid in the cart, one on my hip, and one on the floor wallering around in a tantrum. Those people mean well, they do. Apologies on behalf of all of them. Forgive them. They’ve just forgotten how slow a clock moves in Diaperville. What they mean to say is…”You are in a really hard stage, but you’ll get through it. You’ll laugh along the way, but mostly you’re gonna feel tired for years…then it gets better.”
Just when my husband and I start to forget the mass hysteria, we come across some pictures that make me us say “wow, we’ve come so far!” I totally realize telling you “it gets better” doesn’t solve any current problems or take away internal struggles. You still have to go through it and gut some of that stuff out. But maybe these pictures will help you laugh a little at the chaos and see you really are making painfully slow progress! Your life lens is rightfully focused on surviving the chaos of the moment or day or week. Allow me to pull back the lens just for a minute and to reaffirm that the undeniably crucial time you invest now in your sweet peas pays off. Survive, then thrive, friends!
It is always in my philosophy to point out the following statement.
I’m saying it gets better, not perfect…we’re all about imperfection around here.
I started writing this post back in Feb 2013…don’t judge, it’s been a hectic year. I finally finished my rough draft on Saturday, before meeting up with one of my favorite mom-friends, Amy, who was visiting. As we Artswalked and talked downtown, she said, you know that “It Gets Better” campaign for LGBT youth? I always want to say “it gets better!” to parents of the little ones. As she motions to a mom trying to also enjoy the Artswalk with her baby strapped to her and pushing a stroller. My eyes popped out of my head as 1. I realized Amy is a mind reader. 2. I explained this post.
So, I’m thinking it, Amy’s thinking it…maybe you too, want to share the “It Gets Better” Parenting Version. What has gotten better for you? Leave a comment or share on Think Magnet’s facebook page!
I am confident, somewhere a blogger-parent of teenagers is writing a post entitled, “It Gets Worse”. So, until it gets worse, here’s to enjoying the better. –Shelisa