It Gets Better

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Dear Moms & Dads who are in the baby & toddler trenches,

It gets better. Hearing that doesn’t change your exhaustion or frustration or the fact that its a treat to pee in peace…I get it. We had 3 kids in 31 months and then moved 12 hours from support. I know sleep deprivation. I know chaos. I know the time of piecing your day by “What can we do the next 30 minutes?” I  know there are moments and days you secretly, maybe shamefully, wished you had a fast forward button.

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I understand why you may roll your eyes when people tell you to “cherish each day because they grow up fast!”. I rolled my tired eyes too. It was usually when I had a kid in the cart, one on my hip, and one on the floor wallering around in a tantrum. Those people mean well, they do. Apologies on behalf of all of them. Forgive them. They’ve just forgotten how slow a clock moves in Diaperville. What they mean to say is…”You are in a really hard stage, but you’ll get through it. You’ll laugh along the way, but mostly you’re gonna feel tired for years…then it gets better.”

Just when my husband and I start to forget the mass hysteria, we come across some pictures that make me us say “wow, we’ve come so far!” I totally realize telling you “it gets better” doesn’t solve any current problems or take away internal struggles. You still have to go through it and gut some of that stuff out. But maybe these pictures will help you laugh a little at the chaos and see you really are making painfully slow progress! Your life lens is rightfully focused on surviving the chaos of the moment or day or week. Allow me to pull back the lens just for a minute and to reaffirm that the undeniably crucial time you invest now in your sweet peas pays off. Survive, then thrive, friends!

laughing

sleep

feedself

trikes

bucklingin

dishes

It is always in my philosophy to point out the following statement.

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I’m saying it gets better, not perfect…we’re all about imperfection around here.

I started writing this post back in Feb 2013…don’t judge, it’s been a hectic year. I finally finished my rough draft on Saturday, before meeting up with one of my favorite mom-friends, Amy, who was visiting. As we Artswalked and talked downtown, she said, you know that “It Gets Better” campaign for LGBT youth? I always want to say “it gets better!” to parents of the little ones. As she motions to a mom trying to also enjoy the Artswalk with her baby strapped to her and pushing a stroller. My eyes popped out of my head as 1. I realized Amy is a mind reader. 2. I explained this post.

So, I’m thinking it, Amy’s thinking it…maybe you too, want to share the “It Gets Better” Parenting Version. What has gotten better for you? Leave a comment or share on Think Magnet’s facebook page!

I am confident, somewhere a blogger-parent of teenagers is writing a post entitled, “It Gets Worse”. So, until it gets worse, here’s to enjoying the better. –Shelisa

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Comments

  1. This is so awesome – I’ll be sharing it on my facebook page! And – PS – I have an airedale terrier too! He’s 11 now. :)

    • thinkmagnetkids says:

      Thanks Anna! You must send me a picture of your Airedale. We just love ours. He’s two. Total goofball.

  2. I’m the mom of a VERY spirited 21 month old boy. I’m looking forward to all of these “it gets better”s but do have one of my own to share: From “let’s pin you down kicking and screaming and shove this bulb up your nose” to “let’s blow your nose”. That’s been a huge one in our house :)

    • thinkmagnetkids says:

      Carlee, I love the blow your nose thing. That’s huge! I’ll add your comment to the Think Magnet FB page too. Thanks for sharing. And, allow me to pat you on the back, high five, and give you a cyber hug as a “mom of a 21 month old spirited boy.” I had a very spirited girl. It’s tough…but it gets better!:)

  3. This post made me cry! I have spent the past 2 days trying to keep my 23 month old snotty cold-ridden boy from licking and kissing the newborn and passing along his cold. Changing soaking wet t-shirts from his running nose, and constant nose wiping, while trying to feed baby and keep the 2 apart. It has been the most challenging 2 days of my parenting life! Thank you for this post, I feel deep in the trenches right now, but know it’ll get better.

    • thinkmagnetkids says:

      Oh Nicole. I feel your snot. You are definitely in “survival mode” and I hope your son’s cold is better today. Don’t forget to take care of yourself in all that mess. While “it gets better”, that fact isn’t wiping the snot away. I found when I embraced the chaos, took pictures of it, shared stories with my friends, etc, that I was able to laugh at it more often…not that I didn’t cry. There was plenty of that! Get yourself some small breaks somehow—a bath, a book, phone a friend…etc. Baby step your way through the day and know collectively all parents are cheering you on, because we’ve all been there.

  4. natalie says:

    From fighting naps to getting right in bed, from screaming trying to communicate to talking. It really does get better. I have twins due in September. .. I’m hoping to remeber this post during the first few months!

    • thinkmagnetkids says:

      Natalie, oh YES how bedtime has gotten better! WAY better! And communication is maybe the biggest better. No doubt you’ll be super busy starting in September, but you’ll know it gets better! :)

  5. Candice says:

    I have 3 1/2 yr and a 2 yr old boys. The 2 yr old is….”spirited”(ok let’s be honest he’s a monster. Most loving and affectionate kid I’ve met but MY GOD). Climbing bookshelves, countertops and baby gates since 10 months old. The last yr has been a doozy. And I just found out I’m pregnant….omgomgomgomg.

    That being said, my “it gets better”….my 2 yr old had a texture aversion with food. Chewed and spit out EVERYTHING from 14-22 months. I don’t know how he survived lol.
    Now? He will eat anything I put in front of him :) It does get better. Which is what I will be repeating to myself every five minutes for the next 8 months

    • thinkmagnetkids says:

      Candice, Just think, by the time you new baby arrives your boys will be that much older and more capable! Still not easy, but better. My 2nd child was also a climber. I’d just sit down to feed my 3rd baby and she would have scurried up on top of a table or toilet:) Isn’t it nice when feeding gets better? There’s many stages of “better” with babies, infants, toddlers, and preschoolers. Cheers to that!

  6. And just when you think you’ve figured it out, they grow into another phase LOL! Found on Mop it up Monday :)

    Stop on by and share at our SUPER SUNDAY Link Party:
    http://whoneedsacape.com/2013/06/super-sunday-party-4/

    Lori
    Whoneedsacape.com
    Not Your Average Super Moms!

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